Ever since I have had the opportunity to own a vehicle, I have tried to keep it clean and looking nice. A shiny car always looks newer, and it just makes me feel better driving a nice clean car.
After all of the snow, ice, salt, etc. from the past couple of weeks, the vehicles were in need of a good scrub down. So I jumped on the first opportunity to do so.
After getting everything set up, I lined the cars in the driveway. Much to my inconvenience, my 2 and 3 year old were wanting me to go jump on the trampoline with them. I kept trying to encourage them to jump without me, but to no avail. My wife tried to encourage the same turning to me and saying, "they just want to spend time with you".
I have never been one to mix work and play, so any time the boys 'help', I just end up becoming frustrated and upset with them.
Nevertheless, I let them out to help, and the inevitable chaos ensued. I promise you, when little boys get around water they grow extra hands just to cause more trouble. There were so many tiny hands in the bubbles, and all of the wash rags went straight into the muddy puddles. There was running and splashing; along with the clean areas being dirtied again. The faster I tried to work, the more spots I was missing.
My clean soapy water kept getting lower and dirtier each time the boys dunked their rags in it.
I was so frustrated that I was about to send them both inside, and then it hit me. Actually, God hit me. Right upside the head. Just like all of those times I was acting up in church and thought I was out of the reach of my father.
He reminded me that there are hundreds of thousands of dad's who would give everything they own for their child to ask to spend some time with them. So many fathers who ache just to see their child one last time. Here I was, being frustrated by my boys for simply being boys. I wasn't willing to enjoy their laughter and rowdiness while I have them by my side.
All of the extra work and all of the missed spots seemed to fade from my mind when I began to think of what my heavenly Father must feel like when dealing with us. I read into the frustration that Jesus had with the disciples on many occasions. Either for their lack of faith, their inability to stay awake and pray, their fear or their simple lack of understanding.
I wonder if Jesus was ever ready to throw in the towel, send them on their way and do it Himself?
I wonder if He ever questioned His Father, if all of the extra work and all of the repetitive teaching was really doing any good at all. It seemed as if they would never get it because their agendas of being the greatest in the kingdom was always in the front of their mind.
Before this time with my boys, I had always wondered why He uses us. I could never figure out why He would take all of the extra time to deal with the frustration of our lack of obedience and faith, instead of just destroying the earth all together.
It had never made any sense until those two filthy, soaking wet boys came running up to me. With the biggest smiles on their faces, they yelled, "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" Now I know, and now I understand.
You may see me driving around town in a shiny, black SUV with dirt spots down along the side. You may wonder why I would take the time to hook up the hose, fill the buckets, get the rags, scrub down the car, and yet, not get it completely clean.
To this I would have to say, "because each one of those imperfections remind me that my children love me, and want to spend time with ME more than anything in the world."
This is what our heavenly Father desires of us, as well. That no matter what this world throws at us, we would always choose Him over it all. Not because we have to, or because we know that's what He'd like us to do...but because we WANT to. Because we can't get enough of His presence. Because being with Him is better than anything else in the world.
